Camping, Nanook, Jumbone, Dented Car

So I gave Nanook a Jumbone on the last evening, figuring if I was having a treat then he should too. And man did he appreciate it!! He snatched, which he never does unless it's GOOD stuff, went to lie down opposite the tent, just enough away so as to be in eye sight but no where near enough close that I could reach out and take the precious Jumbone, and I'm telling you that dog went to town. He was making grunting noises that reminded me of perhaps a whale feasting on giant seal after months and months of frozen sea trekking. He chewed and he grunted and he swallowed and he growled with pleasure. And then I got my treat out. 

Id just made a lovely warm cup of hot chocolate and I considered my treat options. Chocolate biscuits or Dairy Milk Oreo bar?? To be honest the decision didn't take all too long and in my head that question actually went "chocolate biscuits or Da-" and then the decision was made. So I gently, like in the adverts almost seductively, like this chocolate bar was going to be in for a bloody good night of gentle spanking and silky bondage, caressed the outside of the smooth bar. I felt the perfectly square nobbles of chocolate underneath, aching for their release. I carefully followed the easy unpacking instructions and pulled the paper seems apart. I felt like I was unpopping the shirt buttons of Sean Bean such was my excitement. 

And there it was. Slutty, tantalising, beautiful Orea stuffed chocolate. I broke a length off. And that's when the romance ended. And I ended up with a dent on my car. 

Nanook, with his selectively astounding hearing, had heard the rather erotic unveiling of what should have been MY guilty pleasure. His Jumbone which had served him so well was now officially defunct. It all happened in slow mo. As I opened the top layer and snapped off the length that would have been at least a meals worth of calories, I had a huge open mouthed "yay" expression on my face. At the same time, Nanook with ALL of his force, who also happened to be mid lick of his Jumbone, LAUNCHED the Jumbone towards the car. As my "yay" face looked up to great a flying, top lip flapping, ears pinned back with G-force, pupils so dilated they were totally black, wolf, the Jumbone, in equal amounts of slow motion, went hurtling through the air.

It made a "whooomppp-whooomppp" noise as it tumbled through oxygen particles, parting like the Red Sea in a direct line to my car door. And as my face began to droop to a "nooooooo" face, and Nanook has successfully made his way over to the tent, skidding on all fours to come to an abrupt mouth open half, he pawed me straight in the eye to beg for the chocolate, and the Jumbone made a rather loud "clunk" noise as it rocketed off the paint work. 

In summary, Nanook got his chocolate, my car is now damaged, and I have learnt Jumbones are not only a tasty dog treat, but also a weapon.   

#BelowTheLine - Day 4.. I cheated.. sort of

I know. I am a terrible human being but I did.. I cheated. Sort of.

You see it was bloody lovely outside and in the fridge were some cans of Fosters lager. I didn't buy them. They are my mums. But she doesn't want them... so they are sort of a gift.. so that means free right?? Did I cheat???? I don't know!!! But between lunch and tea time when I was absolutely starving and sitting outside enjoying the sunshine I cracked and I had one. It filled me up a little bit which I really needed today, I was so hungry!

My menu today was EXACTLY the same as Tuesday. And it was still really nice but this was the third day of value instant mash - my inside are starting to hurt a little bit and thats honestly, not exaggerating. I feel very heavy in the mid section.

Tomorrow is the last day!!!!!!! And I have pizza and garlic bread for tea!! YIPPPEEEE!!


Breakfast = 16p
25g porridge - 2p
Jam - 2p
Banana - 12p

Lunch = 31p
2 slices bread - 12p
Cream cheese - 10p
Cucumber - 9p

Dinner = 41p
Mash - 13p
Sausages - 14p
50g peas - 5p
Carrot - 9p

Treat = 8p
2 Digestives - 2p
Cup of tea - 1p
Chocolate mousse - 5p

DAYS TOTAL SPEND = 96p

#BelowTheLine Day 3 - Not that bad really!

Chicken Pie 28p

TEA! 1p

Hia! I won't bore you with everything I did today again (or if you haven't read, click here) but a quick update on here - it's not that hard really!! As long as you keep busy then you get used to it incredibly quickly. Yes I had the 3.30pm munchies and 5.30pm seemed an age away, but after tea I am SO full that I can't fit in my tea and biscuit!! (I still will though. Because I'm fat)

Breakfast was a lovely porridge, jam and banana medley. I must admit I am craving an egg or two with soldiers.. porridge is starting to look a little bit like snot. With a nose bleed.

Mousse 5p

Digestive 1p

Lunch was the same as the other day - a nice ham sandwich which I had to eat within seconds between driving lesson and job interview. 

Tea was SO FILLING!! I had exactly what I did yesterday but today I had a chicken and veg pie. As you will see from my shopping list below, 3 whole pies were only 86p and mercifully there was gravy in it.. I say mercifully because that mash is so damn dry!!

For pudding I had a 5p chocolate mousse and for the start of the soaps, a cup of tea and a digestive biscuit :) yummo scummo and very satisfied. Oh by the way... missing chocolate biscuits?? Put some chocolate mousse on a digestive!!!

Breakfast = 16p

25g porridge - 2p

Jam - 2p

Banana - 12p

Lunch = 38p

Ham 20p

Bread 12p

Lettuce 4p

mayo 2p

Dinner = 37p

Chicken pie 28p

Carrot 9p

500g peas - 5p

Mash 13p

Treat = 8p

2 custard creams 2p

Cup of tea 1p

Mousse - 5p

DAYS TOTAL SPEND = 99p

#BelowTheLine Day 2 - Could of done with...

Hia! How are you doing? You can let me know in the comments below or by Twitter if you like. I'm doing alright. I walked 5 miles today in practice for Three Peaks (text BEAR91 £1.00 to 70070 to give a quid!) and I did some yoga on what I feel was a practically empty stomach!! Especially after lunch.

For breakfast today I had the same as yesterday and will be doing for the whole week because it's so cheap and I am getting one of my 5 a day in. It was very lovely once again and I didn't need any more than I had.

Lunch though felt disappointing. I had two slices of Tesco bread, one fifth of a pack of value cream cheese and four relatively thin slices of cucumber. That was it! And after a session of Wii fit and yoga on a half portion of porridge and a banana, I was RAVENOUS. It was nice don't get me wrong!! But I really wanted a big cereal bar or something.

After I did my Three Peaks mini walk which took just over an hour and a half of fast paced walking, I was looking at the twigs in the road wondering if it would be nutritionally worth it. I got home about 3.30pm and didn't stop looking at the clock until it was 5.30pm and acceptable tea time.

Tea was surprisingly large!!! But soooooo dryyyyyyyyyyyyyy. I used just under 200g of carrots and 100g of frozen peas, 2 value sausages and one third of a packet of tesco own instant mash. It so badly desperately needed gravy and salt but unfortunately I had not budgeted for such luxuries.

I cannot complain though. Someone put it into perspective for me today - 22,000 children will die TODAY due to poverty. I'm not dying.. and I'm not really that hungry. I am programmed to just want more. Twenty two thousand kids. 

Breakfast = 16p

25g porridge with 150ml water - 2p

35g of jam - 2p

1 banana - 12p

Lunch = 31p

2 slices bread - 12p

1/5th of a tub of cream cheese - 10p

4 slices of cucumber - 9p

Dinner = 41p

1/3 of a packet of mash - 13p

2 Sausages - 14p

50g peas - 5p

200g Carrot - 9p

Treat = 8p

2 custard creams - 2p

Cup of tea - 1p

Value chocolate mousse - 5p

DAYS TOTAL SPEND 96P

#BelowTheLine Day 1: Not so bad!

25g of porridge = 2p

35g of jam = 2p

Good evening! Just as the soaps come on and I am about to have my daily allowance of one cup of tea with a biscuit, I thought I'd drop in as promised and let you know how the day went.

It started off really well. I had half the portion size the packet said I should have of porridge with water, mixed fruit jam and a banana. I was really surprised that I didn't feel I needed more than that. It was tasty, it was nice and warm when it was chilly outside. And for a total of 16p I was feeling pretty darn smug!

1 banana = 12p

Ham, lettuce + mayo = 35p

But as nice as it was, I was really hungry an hour and a half later.. even after having a pint of water too!

I remained brave until lunch time when I launched into my ham, lettuce and mayonnaise butty. It was mega scrum but it felt like it was lacking a slice of 

cheese and a packet of salt and vinegar crisps. And a chocolate bar!.. this is an eye opener in how fat I am lol

Lunch filled me up for approximately 5 minutes. Then the long slog to tea time began. I was absolutely ravenous!!!!! And I made the whole thing so much harder on myself by cooking blueberry muffins to freeze, purely because I forgot to cook them the weekend before and the ingredients were going off. GOD they smelt so good!!! 

100g pasta = 4p

Can of meatballs = 40p

I drank another 2 pints of water, did some Wii yoga before it was finally time to cook... dum dum duuurrr.... a can of value meatball and spaghetti pasta. Without a doubt the absolute blandest meal I have ever had!! The tomato sauce the meatballs came in was VILE and I wish I hadn't poured any on. BUT it was filling to the point I actually left some. But not satisfying. I don't know what it is I want or need because I have had three meals. It simply must be because I am used to more. 

The day is done though and just in time for a cup of tea and a biscuit. Below is what I used and what I spent.

Breakfast = 16p

25g porridge with 150ml water - 2p

35g of jam - 2p

1 banana - 12p

Lunch = 35p
3 slices of ham - 18p
2 slices of bread - 12p
4 leafs of lettuce 4p
2 dollops of mayo - 1p

Dinner = 44p
1 tin of meat balls - 40p
100g of spaghetti - 4p

Supper = 5p

2 digestive biscuits = 4p

1 cup of milkless and sugarless tea = 1p

DAYS TOTAL SPEND £1.00

#BelowTheLine Food Shop Done!

Alright!! The shopping has been done. And here is a picture of most of what I got. The other bits like the sausages and the chicken pie I completely forgot to put in the picture and by the time I remembered I had put it all away. So not getting it all back out for a pie lol.

I did a practice shop on Tesco online so I knew I was going to be able to get it all done and on budget.

Below is how I plan to do it and how much the actual shop cost, and how much it will cost per serving.

Shopping List

• 3pk chicken and veg pies - 84p
• Value lettuce - 57p
• 10 slices value ham - 61p
• 4pk chocolate mousse - 20p
• 2 x mini pepperoni pizzas + garlic bread - 50p (it was buy 3 for 2 and I got 46p back)
• 8 x sausages - 56p
• 1L long life skimmed milk - £1.06
• 5 x bananas - 61p
• 200g Cream cheese - 49p
• 1/2 Cucumber portion - 45p
• 500g dry spaghetti - 19p
• Meatballs in tomato sauce - 40p
• 26 x digestive biscuits - 30p
• Chicken soup - 24p
• 454g Mixed fruit jam - 29p
• 1kg Porridge oats - 75p
• 120g Packet mash (serves 3) - 20p
• 80 teabags - 27p
• 1kg frozen peas - 99p
• 800g Wholemeal thick slice bread - 50p
• 500ml Mayonnaise - 40p
• 1.5kg Carrots - 69p

TOTAL SHOP = £11.11 << weird amount!!!! Number fairies.

Now I know the shopping list total is more than £5 and the object of the game is to do 5 days at £5 but once broken down into their serving sizes, I can not only have 3 meals a day with a brew and 2 biscuits for supper, but I can have them all for LESS than £1 a day - except for Friday when I spend £1.01.

For each blog post, I will break down exactly what I had and how much a portion cost me. Exciting.

£1.00 a Day Meal Challenge

Hey folks. Ok so I am not doing it all official like by signing up and getting sponsors, simply because I can't ask all my friends to sponsor me for something else when they have already given so generously to my Three Peaks Challenge (click here for more info on that). But I am going to give this a go!

The premise of the idea is that over 5 days you have £5.00 to spend on food for the whole day. That's £1.00 a day (maths genius). Baring in mind that a single red bell pepper from Tesco is 80p, and baring in mind that thousands of people do live on around £1.00 a day, this exercise is going to be both challenging and eye opening.

I am starting the challenge on Monday through to Friday and will post my findings and what I had to eat daily, with pictures so you can see portion sizes and that I'm not lying! I will also try and do calorie counts as that will be very interesting too. I will also try and get stuff for free and on the cheap! This means foraging for nettles to make a nettle soup, finding berries to maybe make a jam and nipping up to Tesco which is my local supermarket on an evening to try and get the cheapest cuts of meat or going off veggies. It takes me 45 minutes to walk up to the supermarket by the way and to save on the money, I will be walking to and from it rather than get the bus.

I'm looking forward to it!! Keep coming back and seeing how I get on :D And if you would like to know more and/or donate to this challenge, please visit Live Below the Line

Wish me luck!!